Being your(better)self

aku selalu bertanya dalam hati (bahkan teman2 sekitar), apakah stereo voice-ku sungguh begitu annoying? sebagian ada yg menjawab "ngganggu parah, La'. mosok gak nyadar?", "nggak ganggu kok *dia sambil pake ear muff", dan sebagian lagi menjawab "enggak kok. itu yg membuatmu unique. just be your self" (-- mungkin dia sedang tdk ingin ribut denganku.

oke, (dengan dalih) Be Yourself.

dan kebetulan sekali, mingggu kemarin, kelasku mengadakan gathering di daerah Batu. and we've made a games yang intinya ntar sekelas bakalan nulis di kertas tentang diri kita. tentang segala rasa yg terpendam, dan asa yg tak terungkapkan. *tssaaaaaahh
and here we go, their voice of mine ...

my friend's voice about me :') damned thanks :)

ALL OFF THEM (oke exactly 99.9%) menulis bahwa suaraku memang badly annoying. sejenak aku berpikir defensive dg berkata :
"ah, gak juga kok. aku khan gak selalu tereak2. toh meskipun aku scream out loud, aku tetap unyu maksimal. dan kliatannya, semua juga nggak keberatan2 amat" dan juga
"ah, itu yg membuatku beda. just be yourself, Lala".
aaand cut!
kita berpindah ke sisi yang agak mature.
you are not teenage anymore. time for growing mature,
Lala. kalo misal kamu liat cwe' yg sukanya bentak2, ngomongnya keras, and so on, what do you feel? *ibu peri nanya.
mmmmm... biasa aja *jawabku. dan ibu peri pun bunuh diri.
dan aku sadar bahwa just be yourself doesn't mean that you have to keep doing something different from other people. but something better.

"being yourself doesn't mean being egoist and not hearing other opinion. if its make you better, why not?"aku

as "Peace. it does not mean to be in a place where there is no trouble, noise, or hard work. it means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart."
— Lady Gaga

PS : you guys just annoyingly break my balls, but i love you guys. IKM A 2009. oh iya, thanks buat yg ngasih stapler. pasti berguna bgt. eh, yg dapet kado jam meja kuning, itu dari aku. dari akuuuu. hha

the newest page

" i've made a tumblr, and you may visit "

http://helosyalala.tumblr.com/ 

i dont exactly know what this page really for, but i use as a part of my picturesquene :) enjoy

HNMUN or : is it a sign for?

tuesday, may 10th
oke, sent !! yea, i've sent some pages required by HNMUN's committee, cv and motivation essay at 10.00 am sharp. yes, motivation essay. i never write this kind of writing even in my dream. so, this is my first. i dont know how the motivation essay gonna be like? oke, just try.

see? my begining paragraph is so freaky-weird. hha. is it looks like write on diary??

it is freak. but an amazing thing usually need a brief of. (beneran aneh sumpah!)

wednesday, may 11th
messages received. subject : schedule for interview (may 5th, 04.56 p.m).
it said that i must be there on friday, may 13th at 06.45 p.m or less than. absolutely for interviewing me. what?? interview?? *pingsan. lebay deh :D

HNMUN interview schedule

friday, may 13th
im already arrive at 6.15 p.m on Unair Library (campus B) and Mr. keeper say : NO! you're not allowed for going to AMCOR !!! *horror backsound. mata saya pun mulai berkaca-kaca. berakting dan mulai merayu. " pak, pliiis. saya ada interview nih. bentaaaaarr aja ya pak". and im allowed :D i run as fast as possible (inspired by forest gump) and when im on the 3rd floor of library, dark. theres no light of lamps that turned on, except AMCOR. so im on my way to, till im in front of AMCOR and meet a man with sugar smile. really sweet sweet and sweet. (are you a kind of Logan Lerman? or even Anne hatheway?) and short conversation happened. really short and absurd.
Saya : am i late?
Mas Berkawat Gigi : who are you? (sambil senyuum. maniiiiss banget) :') hha. bukti bahwa saya sungguh bukan artis
S : applicant
MBG : ask to him. a boy wearing brown shirt
end.
im entering the room. i think its not a kind of interview session. theres a tart cake, 17 candle formed, camera, and people around. yea, its AMCOR's birthday. interview postponed. and party begin.

saturday, May 14th
IM SO NERVOUS. somebody calm me down pleaseeeeee. blank. i forget all that i remembered. i lost all that i've prepared. ya Alloh lebay bet deh aku yak. kenapa bisa se nervous ini. jawab ngasal se ngasal2 nya. but i knew what i've said. no shit. and i've tried to give my best. :D aku jadi nyadar, ternyata english fluency ku masih belepotan. need more treatments :D
AND, i forgot all that i answered except a brief part of the question : Whats ur motivation? " everybody can be a nation ambassador on their way. so do i. maybe this is my way. who knows? i just try" i answered.
i knew it seems like just a dream. or maybe my daydreams. i dont care. i just try..

"cause dreams are not foolish"

even John Lenon said
you, you may say im a dreamer
but im not the only one


PS: thanks to @ndiarn and @fee522 for supporting me a lot :D
to @ndiarn: you said that its a sign? yea, u're right. a sign for me to learn more. hha

untitle

my heart is undescribeable. just like a willing for screaming, crying and smiling at the same time

Hi Kartini !!

source:google (forget the exactly.sorry)

Kartini KW I :D

my aunty

Kartini KW II&III :D

bukan seberapa banyak jenis pekerjaan pria yang juga bisa dilakukan oleh wanita,
tapi aktualisasi diri tanpa mengabaikan tupoksi :)

Selamat Hari Kartini,
Selamat hari kesetaraan berbalut keberadaban.

sushi wannabe :D

its not just a KWU task, but more...
this is it, our sushi wannabe,

proses pembuatan

Rainbow Sushi Wannabe

nama perusahaan : OISHI
nama produk        : Rainbow Sushi
chef                      : Leli - Isna - Adia - Lala - Diar - Beli Ida :D

just try this smells-good Sushi wannabe. healthy good taste :) hha
(biarlah semua orang berkata apa. mereka cm iri gabisa buat. huft :D)

freaky handrawing = spirit booster

     i often think : how happy they are that having a boyfriend. theres someone that always be on their side and make them happy. ya, they have spirit booster to face this harsh world. me? no one. i feel so alone. taking a breath was so hard and spiritless.

     BUT their face made me realize. i was not alone as my-BLAH-thought. betapa bodohnya melupakan mereka yang tak hentinya mengirimkan sms : bagaimana kabarmu, Nak? ; gimana tadi ujiannya? mudahkan? ; iya, pama selalu mendoakanmu, anakku

i've just already realized...

i promise i wont think that-BLAH-thought again. therefore i made this freaky handrawing and put it on the wall. supaya aku selalu ingat, ada mereka yang setiap hari menyemangati, doa tiada henti, dan logistik yang selalu terpenuhi. itu karena mereka. hanya karena mereka, not the others.

hahaha fantastic five

aku hanya ingin melihat rekahan senyum mereka melebar...

i just write,
lala